The lusty fingers,
As I walk,
In the silent wind.
Singing the eternal elegies of life,
My mind crumbles with the bygone years,
Played in the tattered strings of seclusion,
Provoking my core with an enormous thrust,
Cracking up my heart with ablaze,
I can hear my blood seethe,
As I walk,
In the silent wind.
The fate of my survival,
The spill of the fiery memoirs,
Tormenting me brutally,
Stabbing my soul second by second,
Tears that streamed down my eyes,
Turned acidic today,
I hear them still bawling,
As I walk,
In the silent wind.
[Published in: Fried Eye online magazine (June 2010) and Cynic Mag (August 2010)]
13 comments:
This is so beautiful.. I think you have felt these words to have written them so wonderfully.. Lovely.. :)
Amazing writing!
A few words...
"Jism yahan reh gaya, tum rooh sath le gaye...
Cheerz..!"
Priyanka, wow, I have to say this is one of your best. The imagery tantalizes the veins throughout the body. Fantastic verse.
This is very well written, Priyanka, but seems so filled with pain and lament. I hope it is not written from experience.
love the image, well done!
Good poem, I especially like the line "The spill of the fiery memoirs."
You might have a typo with the line, "Cracking up my heart with a[]blaze."
Thank u every for the kind feedbacks.
@Steve: Thanx for ur feedback Steve. i appreciate it.. the word 'ablaze' is not a typo. it brings out the same meaning as the word 'blaze'. there are a few other words which brings the same meaning as the other, e.g new and anew, fresh and afresh, etc. u can find them in the dictionary :)
Thanx
"I can hear my blood seethe..." Tremendous line. Great one shot! Love and Light, Sender
The reflections and sentiment strike me as deeply sad and profound.
you strike a deep sad chord, Priyanka.. a lovely write-up here :)
just a suggestion, perhaps you can get a template where there is more room for the post and less for the sidebar? :)
My One Shot
This is so beautiful and specially the end was perfect...
ॐ नमः शिवाय
Om Namah Shivaya
Connect with me on Twitter at @VerseEveryDay to read one verse everyday on life, love and longing...
This is beyond heartbreaking .. I believe this is the modern tragedy; whether poverty, war, disaster, how many have to walk in the silent wind bawling at the universe. Loved these lines:the lusty fingers ..singing the eternal elegies of life. Excellent write! Thanks, Gay (@beachanny)
an amazingly well written piece..thanks for gracing one shot with it..cheers pete
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